Swedes In Real Life

So I feel I need to get a couple of things straight about Swedes -- a little anthropology in what has pretty much been a travel-only blog. Let me talk about life in Sweden.

I realized how very Swedish I was a few days ago -- and have re-recognized this every other hour since. When I am biking to class in the morning, and in ten minutes I pass hundreds of quaint houses and monumental university buildings (to put UCLA in the dust), I realize that I am living as a Swede. When I am in the supermarket and have only bought a few things (which still costs $30-$50), and therefore must return in a day or two, I realize that I am living Swedish. When I pass an advertisement and can actually read it, I feel Swedish. When I pass an advertisement and it's in English, still (oddly) I feel Swedish -- for the sheer fact that English has invaded this pristine culture like influenza. Well, maybe not invaded and maybe it wasn't pristine. But it certainly is no fun when you're trying to practice your Swedish and the cashier will only respond to you in English!

But here's the thing about Swedes:

They are very polite, and yet very rude. There is no word for "please" in Swedish, and there is no need. Even to say "thank you" marks you a foreigner (I refuse, despite this, to not say "thank you" -- it's just wrong to me, a well-raised American!). Swedes are not overtly friendly -- will not immediately befriend you and show you around town like a Chicagoan would. And yet they are very nice, they will always help a tourist, no matter how American they appear!, and will always provide a word of Swedish when you ask for it (it's how I learned how to say shampoo and conditioner!)

On the same token, Swedish girls are very conservative. While comfortable with their bodies -- at any age -- they do not mind being naked in the lake or bare-chested at the beach, still they are not as sexually loose as American movies make them out to be.

Nor do they still have that lilting accent of old Swedish ("I lahf me leetle dahter, jaaaaaa!"). Some sound more American than me! This is thanks to American television. Because there are only 9 million Swedes, it is not worth the cost to dubb or to produce Swedish-speaking television. So Oprah comes on every day at 2pm, and she speaks English with Swedish subtitles. Even in Sweden.

They are, indeed, very attractive, but only about as attractive as the average American university (but possibly not UCSB, which is the most attractive by far of Californian universities, if not all American colleges). They don't dress particularly chic (read: European), either. I see the type of sandals that my dad wears a lot -- you know, the velcro straps every which way, binding in your foot, that always leave weird tan lines on your feet. Except now it's not for dads going to the zoo with their sons and daughters -- kids, teenagers, university students, all the way to grandpas wear these shoes. It's entirely unbecoming. So far I am very disappointed in Sweden's fashion sense.

So, in the end, Swedish people are just ... well, Swedish. Their obsession for punctuality and love of schnapps is only the icing on the complex social cake. More updates on this are to come, I am sure.

Some Swedish for you to learn:
supermarknad -- supermarket (ICA is a popular store)
tack -- thank you
tack så mycket -- thanks a lot (so far, I have only heard my American friends say this)
engelska -- english
Svenskarna är svensk -- Swedes are Swedish